Mother ( noun): superwoman, teacher, friend, wife, sister, doctor, chef, housekeeper, CEO etc.. the list goes on. The list is long when we consider the many roles a mother fills on a daily basis. As a mother of two, small children, under school age, I know firsthand the joy-filled rollercoaster ride of Motherhood. From experiencing their first steps to first words, first day of school to last, extracurricular activities to school dances and other upcoming milestones, we as moms are our children's first, and often loudest, cheerleaders. Watching these little humans become independent, rule breaking and compassionate individuals of their own is one of the most rewarding experiences of my life, while also continuously teaching me more about myself, my capabilities and my capacities.
Being a mother is a full-time job. There is no steady paycheck, or breakroom in which to disappear for a much needed reprieve from the tiny, demanding boss who rules your heart. Working around the clock, and giving your all, the mental and emotional load is both heavy and worth it. Mother's Day is all about celebrating women's dedication to their effortless hard work. But honestly, it's more than just about chocolates, flowers, and cards. Here is what mothers actually want for Mother’s Day: a break.
- Relaxation. A day to indulge in some form of self care, alone. Whether that's a day at the spa, a massage, a trip to the hairdresser or nail salon or any other activity of interest to them. It can look like doing absolutely nothing, such as watching their favorite shows or reading a book, or heading out for a quiet walk in nature. Whether they are a stay at home mom or a working mom, time to oneself is hard to come by; especially time that is uninterrupted or lasts any longer than five minutes. ( I can barely use the bathroom without my kids bussing through the door lol).Give Mom time to relax, and help relieve any stress or overstimulation they may feel throughout the day. You may also consider small acts of service such as breakfast in bed, running them a quiet bath, or inviting them to take a nap!
- Break from Routine. Partners, tackle the never ending to do list yourself. Put yourself in Mom’s shoes for 24 hours, start to finish, and do it all without asking for any help. It is the little things that make mothers feel heard and seen when we do not have to ASK for help around the house. No cooking, cleaning, or decision-making for the day? It's a miracle. One less task on our list means that we have more time to spend it with our loved ones. ( hint: spouses you may actually get that “quality time” you've been waiting for).
- Autonomy: Maternal autonomy means having the power to decide whether you want to become a mother, when, and how. It means having access to comprehensive reproductive healthcare, from contraception to prenatal care. It means being able to make safe, informed decisions about your pregnancy and childbirth, without fear of repercussions. Motherhood is a deeply personal and transformative experience, one that should be celebrated. Every woman deserves the right to navigate this journey on her own terms. One way to support this is by celebrating the strength and resilience of mothers everywhere, and standing by their sides no matter what.
- Support: A strong support system is necessary, particularly during the neonatal period when a mother's daily existence is predominantly centered on infant care. A lot of times, our interactions are limited to the baby and we yearn for adult conversations to escape reality. Support goes beyond helping with immediate care. One thing I’ve come to realize is that it really takes a village to raise a child. Your support system can be the people you lean on for celebrations and challenges. As a member of the village, support can look like listening to a mother’s concerns and feelings, validating her experience, and showing up when needed. Additionally, check in on them regularly, as mothers often prioritize everyone else before ourselves.
The best gift of all is APPRECIATION. Appreciation and acknowledgement for all of the sacrifices, unconditional love and time that went in to give you the best we could offer. And to that, I, on behalf of the moms, say thank you for all the laughs, homemade cards, silly pictures, messy breakfasts, the warm embraces, and phone calls. It means the world. You remind us why we do what we do, and make us feel seen and loved even more on this special day.
Happy Mothers Day!